Having trouble saying “no” to those around you or feeling important can be linked to a problem of healthy emotional boundaries with your environment.
- Growing up a child by instilling in them the idea that the needs of others should come before their own can make them feel unloved.
- Emotional boundary issues with those around you often result in excessive dependency, a fear of asserting yourself, and the need to put the needs of others ahead of your own.
Self-esteem and self-respect are built during childhood, especially with the emotional boundaries that are set by parents. Growing up in the idea that the needs of others come before his own can instill in the child the idea that he does not deserve to be loved.
How do you recognize healthy boundaries from unhealthy ones?
Having emotional boundary issues with family or those around you is often characterized by excessive dependence, with a fear of asserting yourself and the need to put the needs of others before your own. We can also see a fear of abandonment, and a tendency to fall in love emotionally by telling everyone around us.
The person who lacks emotional limits will tend to neglect their own well-being by excusing the disappointments or affronts of those close to them.
How to repair emotional boundaries?
Accepting to repair your emotional limits requires deep personal work that begins with self-compassion in order to learn to trust and esteem yourself. Work on self-affirmation through communication techniques that help to say no and to assume it, but also learning about disappointing others, are also necessary to relearn one’s limits and prioritize one’s own interests.
Working on what you deserve and your own value finally allows you to consolidate your emotional limits and improve your relationship with others.
Find out more: “Families in therapy” by Salvador Minuchin.
