The most embarrassed of all, it will undoubtedly be your runaway. Whether he is escorted by the police or comes home on his own, it will not be easy for him to confront you. It is therefore essential to give it an affectionate welcome. If it is necessary to tell him how much we have been worried – because the runaway teenager needs to be reassured about the love that we have for him – we must be careful of the words that we use not to send back on him the responsibility of our anguish: “We were terribly worried! »But especially not« You made us one of these fears! “. No question either of placing him in the role of the ugly duckling who made a mistake and which we are very good to take back home. In this case, the risk of recurrence is great and the rupture will ultimately be more definitive.
As for keeping a close eye on him to the point of preventing him from leaving our visual field or cutting off his wings by removing his cell phone or pocket money, we immediately forget or else go back to the runaway box! On the other hand, it is imperative to keep an eye on the Internet, especially if the teenager is a girl because meetings on the web are more and more often at the origin of the act. But the only solution to avoid a recurrence is to understand the causes of his departure and to act accordingly.
3 ways to help them get back on their feet
Help her create meaning. Adolescents who run away for a long time express a lack of reference points and links that evoke meaning. Volunteering, a sporting activity, a group cultural practice should help him to create it.
Delegate to third parties. There are specialized listening points, such as Fil Santé jeunes (0800 235 236). But the number will have to be communicated to him by a friend, a sports educator whom he appreciates, because everything that comes from the parents is necessarily null.
Involve the college. The CPE can refer him to the school psychologist. This professional has assets to help him overcome his reluctance regarding psychological follow-up because the parents are not at the initiative of the process.
What to do in the event of a recurrence?
When the runaways are repeated, getting help yourself, as a parent, allows you to distance yourself from the situation and to learn to look at your child from a new perspective to better respond to his suffering. Inadequate educational guidance, parental requirements, strained relations with a step-parent, the causes of running away must be tackled head-on to avoid recidivism.
