Whether it’s quitting smoking, taking up exercise, or spending less time on your phone, it’s always difficult to break a bad habit. Here are some tips to achieve this.
- To successfully get rid of a bad habit, it is important to plan the change and go about it gradually.
- We also need to understand the causes of this habit, and what makes stopping so difficult.
- Finally, moving away from temptation and finding distractions helps you cope with the difficult times of quitting.
Some habits take hold faster than expected. When it comes to getting rid of it, things get complicated. To succeed in breaking away from it, Natasha Dukepsychotherapist at the Cleveland Clinic in the United States, gives 10 tips.
Bad Habits: Plan for Change and Embrace Discomfort
Breaking a bad habit is far from simple, as it very often causes a significant feeling of embarrassment. “As humans, we tend to shy away from discomfort, explains this professional. When we try to make a change, we often wait for willpower to kick in, but in fact, it’s often our unwillingness to tolerate discomfort that keeps us from doing what we need to do.” She recommends accepting this feeling and finding alternative ways to find relief.
For the expert, it is also essential to plan to stop the nasty habit by choosing a specific date. Natacha Duke also recommends writing down several things: the overall objective, the reasons for the change, the intermediate objectives, the causes of the bad habit, etc. “There is often a part of us that wants to change and a part of us that doesn’t want to make a change, or isn’t ready. It’s essential to make room for the last part to mobilize your motivation to change.”
You should complete the list of reasons for change with those of everything that prevents you from carrying it out. Why, deep down, you want to keep this bad habit. “If you don’t recognize your ambivalence, it will be difficult to make real, lasting change.“, she believes.
To get rid of a bad habit, you have to go gradually
Then, it is important to be lucid and tolerant towards yourself. Natacha Duke advises setting small goals, rather than changing everything at once. “For most ‘bad’ habits, I recommend cutting back gradually and avoiding thinking it’s all or nothing.” She gives the example of sugary drinks: if you want to stop drinking them and you want to make a total and immediate stop, then if you drink a can again one day, you will experience it as a total failure and will be tempted to Give up. It is then better to set an intermediate goal such as drinking a less sugary drink for a while, before reducing even further and stopping. This increases your chances of putting an end to your problems.
To quit, you need to try to understand the causes of the bad habit and the reasons why it has been impossible to get rid of it until now. For example, you want to stop biting your nails and you realize that you do it systematically during stressful professional periods, or you want to stop snacking and you realize that you only do it in front of screens.
Distraction, new habits and avoidance: the keys to change
To get rid of these bad habits, it is important to have ideas of distraction for difficult times. This could be going for a walk, meditating, calling someone, or playing sports. “Delaying problem behavior, even for 15 minutes, can reduce temptation.”estimates the specialist.
She adds that the simplest thing is to replace your bad habit with a better one. Drink sparkling water rather than a sugary soda, walk after a meal rather than smoke, or play with an anti-stress ball rather than biting your nails.
Another tip for successful change is to avoid temptations. “If you’re trying to stop biting your nails, keep them cut so short that there’s nothing to biterecommends Natacha Duke. If you want to get rid of your sweet tooth, don’t keep candy in your pantry or refrigerator.”
Bad Habits: Finding Incentives to Change
To cope with the uncomfortable situation, it can be interesting to find sources of motivation. She advises creating a piggy bank with the money saved by getting rid of the bad habit and saving it to treat yourself to something you really like. You can also decide to put a coin in this piggy bank as soon as you manage not to give in to the bad habit. “It’s a great way to get back into a good habit if you stumble along the wayshe adds, and you are more likely to continue in the right direction.“
Another instruction from the expert: be kind to yourself. Indeed, we are generally harder on ourselves than on others. However, to succeed in changing, you must be forgiving and accept relapses. “Think about how you would talk to a dear friend who is trying to achieve a goal, slips the specialist. If he slipped, you would probably say something like, ‘You’re trying really hard, and you can get back on track right now.’
Final advice: never forget the reasons for change. On a post-it on the front door, on your computer or on your phone wallpaper… write down the reasons why you want to get rid of this bad habit, wherever you can.
All these tips, and a good dose of patience, should help you give up this bad habit and make a lasting change. However, if despite your efforts you are unable to break your bad habits, do not hesitate to talk to a health professional, such as a doctor or therapist. This is especially true if you’re dealing with something more complex like an addiction or obsessive-compulsive disorder.