Heartbreak is a strange thing. You have lost a loved one, yet you cannot just grieve and accept the void. After all, the other just lives on. Without you. A broken heart therefore requires a special approach. Below is a step-by-step process on how to heal your love pain.
With a broken relationship, everything falls apart. Your future is going to look very different without your partner. But also your past. Apparently you lived in a lie, because your love doesn’t love you at all. Not only do you feel the pain of the loss, your ego also gets a big push. Moreover, you are confronted with being alone. Not everyone can handle that well.
stress
Like grieving for a deceased person, you go through several stages: Denial, Anger, Grief, Letting Go, and Acceptance. But with a broken heart, these phases can become very intertwined. Sometimes you suddenly seem back to square one.
All these changes and nasty conclusions cause a lot of stress. Your body has to get rid of this energy. You can’t do that by lying on the couch with a box of tissues. Get moving again. This is a natural way for your body to get rid of stress and it also releases positive substances such as serotonin into your blood. This will immediately make you feel a lot better.
Pattern Break
Heartbreak happens to you. But part of it you maintain yourself, by continuing to think about them. You keep saying certain things to yourself that you find very painful. How much pain has been done to you and that there is now another. In doing so, you hypnotize yourself to feel unhappy. You cannot change the situation and the other, but you can change how you think!
Make sure you get different patterns than when you were in a relationship. Think of it as a great opportunity to do things you’ve always wanted to do. Start exercising or that hobby you never got around to. Change small things in your house, where the TV or a particular chair is. Make sure that your living environment no longer resembles the situation when you were with the other person. If necessary, change your shampoo. This will break your old pattern and associations with your ex.
Don’t mope; the longer you do that, the harder it is to get on with your life. Go out, meet up with old friends, do things. Even when you don’t really feel like it. Not to meet a new love, but to see that there is more to do in the world than your ex. Gather friends around you, see that people still love you.
lucky substance
Now that your future plans have been jettisoned, you have the opportunity to invent new ones. Invent an alternative future; in which you are happy and are well over your ex. Try to come up with all kinds of details; what do you look like, what do you do in a day, where do you live? Feel how satisfied and happy you would be. Even if you don’t believe in it, your body will still get a tremendous boost.
Your body reacts to everything you do. When you smile, even if you put on a smiling face, your brain senses it. They register that you use your laughing muscles, conclude that you must be happy and make substances that make you happy. Even though laughing is probably the last thing on your mind right now, try it anyway. If necessary, laugh at the fact that you are trying to laugh. You will feel more comfortable.
desirable toy
Children prefer to play with toys that are difficult to get hold of. They always want to color with the marker that another child just had. Unfortunately, it works the same way with adults. Your ex becomes that unreachable marker. Now you already want him/her back, but if your ex has a new crush, it becomes an even more desirable toy. Be aware of that.
Then a few more pitfalls. Ideally you would like to straighten everything out. That you are really right. And that the other one was wrong. But the chance is small that you will be right, you are separated for a reason. It is better to accept the situation as it is.
Or you are trying to hurt or make your ex-lover jealous. In effect, this is continuing the relationship, but with negative feelings instead of positive ones.
Even worse; you have sex with your ex. This can lead to a lot of complications. You’re the one heartbroken here, your ex-partner probably doesn’t feel that way. If you just want sex, you better find someone else.
