Our brain is our main sex organ. Desire and excitement always pass through him. Thus, it is true that in the event of failure of erection, the mental is often in question, even if, of course, for certain men, the state of the erectile arteries or nerves can be at the origin of disorders. Given your age and the fact that you are in good health, it is rather your psyche that can block erections. Here are several ways to understand what is happening to you.
- If you want a woman more, you may feel more stressed, for fear of not being up to it. When the stakes of a sexual relationship are very high, the stress is all the more so. Clearly, when a man says to himself: “If this woman leaves me, my life is over”, he is in a state of maximum stress, and it is difficult for him to be released during a sexual relationship. However, the erection works well when the sexual arteries are relaxed, and stress constricts the arteries because its purpose is to speed up the heart to allow it to flee or fight in the face of danger. We then arrive at strange situations where sexuality works well when you do not invest a relationship, whereas it malfunctions when the relationship matters to you.
- Sometimes the body “goes on strike” and, I would even say more, the penis “is on strike”! I regularly see this type of case in consultation. One of my patients was constantly receiving insulting text messages from his wife: “You’re just a coward, a loser, a poor guy, etc. He had been putting up with that for a long time and was surprised to have breakdowns. I said to him: “Your body is ‘on strike’, your sex has had enough. He says to himself: ‘But why does he want to make love with a woman who humiliates him? I don’t want to.’” Subsequently, after the separation, this man met a more benevolent. And when I asked him how their first sex went, he said, “It was wonderful.”
- Sometimes still, the romantic relationship is of quality, but there are elements that block your erection. This can be the case if your partner, even in love and desire, finds herself uncomfortable, tense or afraid. This can happen if she is complexed by her body, if she has been touched or attacked… In this case, your emotional empathy is invaded by the negative emotions of your partner, and, suddenly, she has trouble to “tune in” to your desire and excitement.
It also happens that your partner feels absolutely no desire, even if she loves you. And your body may sense this lack of desire and not react to your arousal. It’s as if he were getting discouraged by saying to himself “It’s not worth it, she has no desire. I also find your question extremely interesting, because it emphasizes an element: men are also very sensitive to emotions in sexuality. We sometimes hear it said that, in this area, men have a very mechanical functioning and that, among women, everything is in the head. Well, that’s totally wrong!
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