There are a thousand and one reasons to be angry, disappointed, afraid or even disgusted with someone. This may concern a member of your family, a friend, a lover or a co-worker. But have you considered forgiving this person? Easier said than done. But according to neuroscientists, learning to forgive acts as a band-aid on our deepest emotional wounds.
It is an unpleasant feeling to say the least that the majority of people try to get away from, that of rehashing our feelings against someone who has been unfair, violent or disappointing towards us. Think about this person and your day will be bound to be morally affected. However, ” pass the sponge “ or to forgive would be a reaction to be put forward more, since it would be beneficial for health. This is what researchers at the University of Pisa, in Italy, claim.
Forgive in order to better repair oneself
In their study published in the medical journal US National Library of Medicine, doctors have studied what might happen in the brain when you hold a grudge against someone. For that, they analyzed the behavior of healthy subjects to whom they made imagine unpleasant scenarios against them. Then they asked a number of subjects to imagine themselves ” make peace “ the culprit of this situation and other matters not to forgive. Researchers have found that when you feel bitterness after an argument or a painful event, the brain sets off a process of emotional suffering, which is amplified as you rehash.
If the thoughts are negative, sensors in part of the brain will activate. Conversely, when we forgive, other areas of the brain will activate, such as the precuneus for example. The latter would be linked to the development of empathy. “It is a cognitive and emotional process which eliminates chronic hostility, ruminations and their negative effects: a positive strategy to overcome a situation which would otherwise constitute a major source of stress from a psychological and neurobiological point of view”, explain the researchers of the University of Pisa in their study.
Asked about this by the Huffingtonpost, Robin Enright, an American psychologist explains that many of us confuse the terms ” sorry “ and “Reconciliation”. “You can forgive someone you don’t trust! In fact, forgiveness comes in three stages: acknowledging the harm done to you; deciding not to resent the person anymore. offended you; well, and this is arguably the most difficult step, the attempt to feel compassion for her “, describes the American psychologist.
Better sleep, less stress and a better immune system
There is a broad consensus in the sphere of medical research and mental health around emotional suffering. Ruminating or being filled with anger towards a person represents a real poison for our organism. Thus, resentment affects heart health but also the quality of sleep. Generating negative feelings stimulates the production of stress hormones and even leads to depression.
As reported by the Huffingtonpost, a 2007 study by Robert Enright shows that people with coronary heart disease could see their condition improve after receiving special therapy. Other researchers suggest a better immune system or healthier blood pressure.
