The smaller the age difference, the greater the risk of rivalry.
If a brother and a sister can develop complicity, rivalry is also part of their identity construction. From the age of 5, all children compare themselves to others, and in particular to their siblings.
Understand why there is rivalry
The causes that generate rivalry are often linked to a feeling of injustice or a lack of self-confidence. Being compared to your brother or sister when you have learning difficulties, for example, can encourage this type of behavior.
The child may also be worried about his place in the family and seek his parents’ attention. He may also be unwilling to share or have a conflicting personality.
What to do to reduce rivalry?
To reduce this type of behavior, be careful how you give space to either of your children, explaining to them that you love them equally. To do this, you can, for example, take time alone with each person so that they can feel special.
As far as possible, avoid favoritism or comparisons by not citing his brother or sister as an example but by ensuring that you are as fair as possible in the attention you give or in the encouragement.
Find out more: “Jealousies and rivalries between brothers and sisters – How to overcome conflicts between your children”, by Adèle Faber.
