Getting your child to listen to you requires patience, understanding and appropriate strategies.
Getting your child’s attention and listening skills is a daily challenge for parents. However, some common mistakes can hinder this essential communication. It is crucial to understand these mistakes and avoid them to foster a harmonious and constructive relationship with your child.
Understanding the reasons behind his inattention
Before the age of 3, a child’s brain is still developing, which makes it difficult for them to respect prohibitions or control their actions and emotions. Even if they know they shouldn’t do something, holding back can be very difficult. For example, a 5-year-old may have trouble stopping playing to get dressed quickly, because their immediate pleasure comes first.
Around the age of 2, children begin to assert themselves as individuals. They want to decide certain things for themselves. So, when a rule is imposed on them, they may feel deprived of control, and therefore refuse to cooperate.
Formulate clear and appropriate instructions
To encourage listening, it is essential to formulate clear instructions that are appropriate for your child’s age. Before assuming that he is not listening to you, make sure that he has understood the instruction:
- Speak slowly, limit the number of words and explain one instruction at a time.
- Ask him to repeat what he has learned to check his understanding. For example, instead of saying “Stop jumping on the chair,” say “Sit on the chair.”
- If the rules are constantly changing, he will have a hard time following them. They must therefore be consistent and integrated into routines to become habits. If both parents apply the same rules consistently, he will feel more secure and will better understand what is expected of him.
Encourage through play and choice
Children respond better to instructions when they are presented in a positive and playful way. Using play and imagination can turn a task into an adventure. For example, asking a child to walk on an imaginary wire to put on their pajamas can make the task more fun.
Providing choices is also an effective strategy. For example, if your child refuses to get dressed, always give him a choice of clothing. This will give him a sense of control and encourage him to cooperate.
Finally, praise your child enthusiastically when he follows the instructions. This helps him understand what he has done well and encourages him to continue on this path.
Learn more: “Effective Parenting” by Thomas Gordon.
