The real benefits of the routine
A feeling of security. As we know, the “first times” are often more complicated than expected, and sometimes synonymous with discordance,anxietyparalyzing modesty… Conversely, when we know each other well, we experience a reassuring relationship, conducive to the peaceful development, not only of feelings, but also of sexuality because, suddenly, we can to dare what one would not do with a recent partner, whom one still does not know well.
real rituals. A villainous Sunday siesta, a romantic outing, a shared bath, a massage… Each couple, over the weeks and months, creates their own rituals, which are so many pleasant reunions that punctuate and punctuate daily life. Moreover, it is often these rituals that are most lacking after the separation. If they should not become an obligation, preserving them is beneficial, like so many romantic dates.
A simple sexuality. Not all sexual intercourse requires meticulous preparation, a perfect erotic atmosphere, in short, an extraordinary staging. A bit like meals taken together, we will distinguish the everyday (not necessarily banal or frustrating) from the unusual, which, by definition, is not done every day! As a result, it allows you to find yourself under the duvet without feeling obliged to pull out all the stops, while taking, and giving, pleasure all the same…
A perfect knowledge of the other: without even talking to each other, we know them by heart. We know how to act or react, we know what works well with the other, what we both like… It becomes simple (and not necessarily simplistic), and makes it easier to let go, without fear of missing out.
The possible pitfalls of routine
Boredom. Making love is a bit like going to the cinema: if you always see the same film, if you know the smallest details by heart, you end up getting bored, even falling asleep… Even when you knows what works, you shouldn’t be satisfied with it, at least not systematically…
The lack of desire. There is nothing abnormal because, more or less frequently, one or the other can experience a drop in sexual desire. All you need to do is have your head elsewhere (professional difficulties, various worries), or to be in a phase where relations with the other are a little difficult or conflictual. We forget to talk about it and we risk letting the distance set in…
The lack of communication. “No need to talk to each other, we know each other by heart,” say some couples. Yes but… By force, we forget that the other is evolving, and it becomes difficult to communicate, on possible difficulties as on what is going well! Shame…
The focus. Small quirks or unpleasant habits, once spotted, quickly become exasperating, especially when you tense up on them. We then tend to no longer see the rest or what we still love, even what we loved, and which, however, has not necessarily disappeared. Not terrible for the libido.
The oblivion of tenderness. One day, he went out forgetting his usual kiss on the neck, we didn’t say anything, we got used to it. Or we stopped holding hands in the street, all the little caresses unrelated to sex gradually disappeared. As a result, the bodies move away, intimacy becomes a trickle, desire dulls, and the only connections become strictly sexual.
How to enjoy the best and avoid the worst?
Living a stable relationship, but which remains harmonious and conducive to satisfying sexual intercourse, it is possible…
Multiply the times to two. Even with children, a professional life, a house to keep, it is imperative to grant oneself moments of intimacy that are not limited only to going to bed… Sharing cultural or sporting activities, going on weekends or holidays together (by having the children looked after), going to the cinema or to a restaurant regularly, all of this promotes rapprochement and dialogue, and keeps the flame alive.
Break the monotony. If the room and its bed remain the place of the couple par excellence, it is also good to create the unexpected, the surprise and the excitement by proposals in other atmospheres or places: different rooms of the house, hotel, small isolated corners, etc. Just as it is important, even if everything is fine, to vary the sexual positions, the scenarios… Anything that can increase desire and excitement is authorized, you are alone to define, in pairs, your desires and your limits.
Keep your bodies in touch. Reciprocal massages, baths or showers for two, dressing and undressing, cuddly naps, anything that brings the skin together is beneficial, even without having a direct sexual connotation. Sensuality helps to develop and maintain desire.
Keep surprising yourself. Other hairstyle, other style of clothing, develop the multiple facets which exist in any woman, that will not fail to astonish it. And you will also discover that you are “neither quite the same, nor quite another”. By surprising yourself, you become a stranger to your own existence, you free yourself, and you dare to do different things, who knows why.
