Overcome your phone fear

You can no longer ignore it: the telephone. He is everywhere and always, especially now that most people own a mobile phone. And so everyone is available almost continuously. That can be quite handy, both privately and at work. But if you suffer from phone anxiety, that constant availability will only make you nervous.

Phone Anxiety Forms

Phone anxiety comes in different forms. You may find all telephone conversations terrible. You cannot see your interlocutor and that makes you nervous. It may also be that you find it especially annoying to be called.

You feel attacked when the phone rings. Or you belong to that large group of people who find it scary to pick up the phone and call someone. Especially if it concerns an unknown person, for example an institution or a company.

social anxiety

Phone anxiety is a form of social anxiety. In short, it’s the fear of being embarrassed. If it bothers you, you often feel watched and laughed at. You are afraid of comment, criticism and rejection.

The same goes for phone calls. You have the idea that all your colleagues are secretly listening in and laughing at your conversation. You are concerned about the response of the person you are calling: what if the person is curt or dismissive?

Precisely because you are afraid that things will not go well, your phone call is probably also difficult. And so you postpone every subsequent conversation. Only when you have no other choice, do you key in the number… and go back on-hook.

For your work

It is of course extra annoying if you have to make a lot of telephone calls for your work. Telephone sales are the ultimate example. In that case, you can be sure that not everyone is waiting for your call and that people may feel harassed.

One consolation: you are by no means the only employee who finds calling scary and it is also common among telemarketers. According to some studies, as many as 40 percent of employees suffer from it. And according to those same studies, phone anxiety is the number one reason salespeople fail at their trade.

Tips

Is there nothing that can be done? Yes certainly. There are even courses to help people get over their telephone fear. If that fear takes on very serious forms, it may be advisable to talk to a psychologist. Still, the problem remains within bounds for most people.

If that’s the case for you too, the following tips might help:

• Make sure you know exactly what you are afraid of. Do you get nervous because you have to get something done from someone, because you might make mistakes or can’t keep the conversation going? Do you only find it scary to call authorities or do phone calls to friends also cause problems? If you know what you’re afraid of, it’s easier to do something about it.
• If at all possible, make sure that you cannot be disturbed and that no one is listening. That probably prevents a lot of tension.
• Write down point by point what you want to talk about. Then you can always ‘cheat’.
• Consider carefully in advance what the possible pitfalls are and prepare for them. For example, if you know that you may be pressured over the phone, picture yourself saying, “I want to think about it for a second.” This will prevent you from being caught off guard and getting stuck in your mouth. If you are especially afraid of awkward silences, think of several topics in advance.
• Watch others have a difficult conversation. How does your colleague introduce himself on the phone? How does it make the conversation more personal? How does he or she react when someone becomes rude? You can easily adopt these strategies in your own conversation.
• Check with the other person whether you are calling in a convenient location. That can prevent grumpy reactions.
• Put yourself in front of the block. Enter the phone number and stay on the line. Difficult calls – especially in your head – get harder and harder the longer you put them off.
• It sounds very cliché, but for most people it’s just a matter of doing a lot. The more you hang out on the phone, the easier it gets. Practice makes perfect!