The 4 Toltec agreements are simple keys, inherited from a pre-Columbian civilization, which are intended to help us transform our lives and our relationships into areas of freedom and well-being. The way to achieve this? Identify and challenge the sources of limiting beliefs that rob us of joy and create unnecessary suffering.
It’s been a quarter of a century since this classic personal development appeared and, for many, it remains the most precious work to help the individual come to the end of his limiting beliefs. You know all those thoughts we have developed from childhood under the influence of our parents and our upbringing and which ended up constituting our great “Book of Laws”.
Don Miguel Ruiz’s bestseller has thus become a reference for rethinking his beliefs and therefore his way of seeing and approaching the world. In The 4 Toltec agreementshe explains that what we usually think of as “reality” would only be a dreamor rather the collective consolidation of individual dreams, transmitted between generations and extended by the fantasies of each.
What is the Toltec culture?
Don Miguel Ruiz took over four great precepts from the Toltec tradition, allowing you to live with more serenity. The Toltec culture (of which the Aztecs claimed to be the direct descendants) is a civilization that developed near Teotihuacan (Mexico) between 900 and 1200. The term “Toltec” designates “the master builderthe great architect.
Considered a people enamored with wisdom, the Toltecs would thus have identified four contracts (the 4 Toltec agreements) that the “warrior” spends with himself for free himself from the grip of all his other commitments that keep him in pain or suffering:
- May your word be impeccable.
- Do not react in a personal way.
- Don’t make any assumptions.
- Always do your best.
Better understand the 4 Toltec agreements
1. Let your word be impeccable
The first of the 4 Toltec agreements insists on the power of speakingbut also the inner voice that whispers in all of us. In life, we can get carried away quickly and let our words overtake our thoughts. A correct word is a word that is not dispersed in lies, slander or slander.
In public, always try to choose our words and expressions with tact and meticulousness to remain honest, caring and positive. But the word is also interior. Impeccable speech is that which avoids permanent self-criticism, judgments and comparisons. So it starts with fsilence the unwanted chatter of this critical inner voice, which would claim to judge everything.
2. Do not react in a personal way
The second chord tells you that what happens around you is neutral: you don’t have not to react to it in a passionate way because it happens to you. You are not the center of the world…
It’s about not taking events at face value, involving your ego, when someone disrespects you, for example. VSThis person projects an inner conflict onto you which does not concern you. With this detached posture, you are engaged in the situation, but you make allowances: you react not with your egowhich has nothing to do with this matter.
This agreement consists of accepting thepresent time as it is, to better be able to act on the situations that are staged there. It’s a way of relativize surface events, rooted in a deeper inner experience.
3. Don’t make assumptions
Not making assumptions is arguably the most difficult Toltec agreement to apply because it requires real work on yourself to learn to do not project wrong things or imaginary. Don’t try to interpret reality. In case of doubt or confusion: dare to ask the other person directly to clarify their point of view by simply asking them questions.
Often, we “dream our life” by living it in our head and by doing both the questions and the answers… By daring the direct relationship with the other, we are confronted with reality and we stop making movies !
4. Always do your best
The last of the 4 Toltec agreements may seem trivial but well applied, it leads to a certain personal development. Doing your best doesn’t mean trying to be the best all the time. Wanting to be perfect would mean failing frequently, while doing your best keeps us in a motivating dynamics of progress.
It’s the opposite of putting unnecessary pressure on yourself, from the inner voice that judges you. This also supposes a great requirement in the definition of our objectives and our priorities. We let’s stay grounded in reality instead of taking refuge in the fantasy of a so-called perfection.
It is also about not procrastinating by postponing until tomorrow what can be done the same day, so do not accumulate in your head things to do later. On the contrary, to live intensely the present, to express one’s “being” now by accomplishing, with pleasure, the tasks that arise. Quite the opposite of usual time management.